Tuesday, August 31, 2004
Well I am not feeling that much better today - a bit calmer yes but not much better.... I am trying to hold things together though.... Mom is leaving by the 18th - not as quickly as I would like but she has no $$ right now and needs to make arrangements and I just can't be cold hearted and kick her to the curb... I haven't talked to E since Sunday morning and I am trying to be ok.... Lonely and scared and heartbroken but ok - I was stupid enough to let him back into my heart and he managed to crush it and break it all over again... My own stupid fault I know and I am strong enough to get thru this but it's gonna be tough - I tend to live more by emotion then logic which is often my downfall... The boys have been wonderful though - Deven is really doing well overall and he's been sooo cuddly and affectionate lately that it really lifts my spirits... Dilen is moody but we have an appt w/the doc on Friday.... I still could use some vibes to help me heal and remain calm so keep on sending them.... Not too much else going on - I register Dilen for Kindi tomorrow and they are enjoying the last week of summer camp..... Til next time...
